Holiday Blues

Tuesday, December 10, 2013 , , , , 0

Alex:  This Thanksgiving was my first holiday away from home. There are some things I knew I wouldn’t miss like the clean up and cold weather. But there are a lot of things that I knew I would miss; my grandma’s perfectly mashed potatoes with a touch of garlic, the sound of papa’s electric knife cutting the turkey, football on the big screen, the array of desserts we could choose from after dinner, the festive table decorations (boy does my grandma know how to set the table), all of us sitting down for dinner, sharing what we’re thankful for, eating until I’m in a food coma, laughing, sharing stories, making history. When I was a little girl I’d go to summer camps, leaving home for weeks at a time. I enjoyed the independence, but I always knew I was going back home. And in college, it was so easy to drive home when I needed a hug from dad after a long week or advice from my step-mom on drama that was outside my comfort zone. I checked the prices for tickets home. Then I compared it with my bank account and got sad when the numbers did’t align. It’s moments like these when I realize just how much I took for granted spending time with my family. My parents would invite me over for dinner, but I’d be so preoccupied with my social life that I wouldn’t go. Now, I wish I could go back and drink that second glass of wine and stay in on a Friday talking with my step-mom. I miss those nights the most. I miss how easy it was being in college, being at home, snuggled in my comfort zone. Even when I go back, things aren’t quite the same. People have moved on, new houses have been built, renovations on old parks where I used to spend so many summer nights playing ghost in the graveyard. My old stomping grounds are only in my memory now. Neighborhoods reinvent themselves and now I’m left in a daze wondering how did life go by so fast? I know I may be speaking like I’m 100, but being homesick makes me feel funny. I’m tapping into emotions I didn’t know existed. The excited feeling of moving to a new state, with new friends, with a new dream has passed. Not being home for the holidays showed me that. Do you remember your first holiday away from home?
Nik:  I’ve only been away from home for two holidays and it was because I was in a relationship and went to my boyfriend’s family’s house. It was really sad. I remember watching his family open presents and smile and laugh and hug each other and even though I laughed with them and wore a smile the entire time, I felt empty and my heart ached. I remember calling my mom and choking back tears when I said Merry Christmas so she wouldn’t hear how upset I was. I know she felt the same. It definitely wasn’t easy. Now, I make going home and being with my family a priority because I see them so little. It never gets easy living so far from them. There are so many nights where I wish they lived closer so I could pop in for dinner or laze around and watch a football game together. I guess when you get lonesome, you can video chat them. It’s not the same, but sometimes just seeing their faces makes everything better.
Alex: Yeah, I face-time with my brother Brock pretty regularly.  My favorite is when my dad puts me on speaker and my brother, step-mom are all in the same room so I can talk to all of them at the same time.

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