Alex:  It’s really therapeutic to write down what happened, what you’re thinking or what you’re feeling when something is bothering you. Then reread it. Then reread it out loud. Then listen to what you’re saying. You can learn a lot about yourself and your thinking habits when you do this. I have a tendency to over think. Mainly the little things. So now when something or someone is bothering me, I do this exercise before letting it get under my skin. Here’s my recent example:
A guy I was seeing back home didn’t text me back. I got stuck in the cycle of these thougts: It really annoys me that he didn’t text me back. He even initiated the conversation so I know he knows how to text. What, is he too good for me now that I responded? Maybe my response was stupid. I reread what I sent him. Okay, what I said was definitely stupid. Why did I say that? No… he’s stupid for not texting me back! Or maybe he’s with another girl? He’s for sure talking to another girl! Been there? You don’t have to admit it, but I have a hunch most of you have. So, I wrote my thoughts down…‘I’m really frustrated he didn’t text me back. It’s not that hard to send a text. If you don’t want to hang out just tell me, I can handle it. I’m better than this. I’m not one who likes sitting here, waiting for a guy to text back. He is probably banging some other girl. What am I doing?’ Then, I read it out loud and… laughed. I literally laughed at myself. I can’t tell you how easily I snapped out of that thinking cycle! It really helped to hear my thoughts out loud and hear how silly they were. I forgave myself for being a complete idiot and wasting time on something that didn’t matter. I now do this quick exercise when I start spiraling into a negative way of thinking. I’ve even noticed the cycles happen less often since I’ve started doing this. No more thinking about ‘what if’ and time to start loving what is.
Nik:  Ha.  I do this all the time. I call it being ‘in the hoop’. You just keep running through the same thoughts over and over like a basketball before it pops out or sinks for two. I usually stop by telling myself I’m in the hoop. Get out of the hoop. Take the points or take another shot, but don’t get caught in the hoop because it isn’t productive. Then I replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts (ie. I’m great, I’ll do great, I’ll share my great with other people) which eventually become positive actions (ie. exercise, eat well, call a friend that needs a little support, think about my next creative project).  I hate when I sound like a self-help book, but if you can use a mantra or write your obsessive thoughts/anxieties/worries down, like you suggested, it’ll definitely help pull you out of the hoop and into the present where you can be the happiest, the most effective and the best version of yourself. And let me guess, he texted you back?
Alex:  Sure did